Family Life Experiences of Children After Divorce: A Qualitative Research Parental Alienation
Sümeyra Ceylan Dolanbay, Aslıhan AykaraThe family is the most natural and primary environment for the transformation of a child to an individual with healthy identity development and socialization. A divorced family is a type of family formed by death, divorce, and separation. The current study examines the alienation experiences of a child in a divorced family and the parents, especially the one who was unable to obtain custody after divorce, and the relevant processes. In this regard, the study discusses the experiences of adult individuals who underwent the process until the conclusion of the divorce case of their parents, which occurred before they reached the age of 18 years, and the resultant alienation from their parents. Experiences were revealed using structural family systems theory, which was developed through family interaction patterns. The study intends to recommend solutions to this issue. Toward this end, it conducts in-depth interviews with 29 subjects. The findings indicate that dysfunctional interaction patterns within the family witnessed prior to the before divorce period are related to the grounding of alienation experiences. The study observes that divorce and relevant issues are added to the process (before, during and after divorce) and strengthen alienation. The feelings and thoughts of the subjects toward their parents were formed by events experienced due to dysfunctional relationships within the family and the consequences of divorce. After the divorce, it has been observed that the alienation that the subjects experienced stemmed from their before divorce experiences. Based on the results, the study puts forward the most evident recommendations: To provide family counseling services specifically in the context of parental alienation throughout the stages of divorce and to popularize the practice of joint custody, which is an option in custody cases, for families deemed appropriate.
Boşanmayla Parçalanmış Ailede Çocuğun Boşanma Sonrası Yaşam Deneyimleri: Ebeveyne Yabancılaşmaya İlişkin Nitel Bir Araştırma
Sümeyra Ceylan Dolanbay, Aslıhan AykaraAile; çocuğun sağlıklı kimlik gelişimiyle, birey olabilme ve sosyalleşebilme süreci için en doğal ve birincil ortamdır. Parçalanmış aile ise ölüm, boşanma ve ayrılma olaylarıyla şekillenen aile türüdür. Çalışmada; boşanmayla parçalanmış ailedeki çocuğun, boşanma ve bağlantılı süreçlerde özellikle velayetini alamamış ebeveynine karşı yabancılaşabilmesi durumu ele alınmıştır. Bu doğrultuda araştırmanın amacı; ebeveynlerinin boşanma davasının sonuçlanmasına kadarki süreci 18 yaşından küçükken geçirmiş ergin bireylerin ebeveyne yabancılaşma konusundaki deneyimlerini, aile içi etkileşim örüntüleri üzerinden geliştirilen yapısal aile sistemleri kuramı aracılığıyla ortaya koymak ve bu konuyla ilişkili çözüm önerileri geliştirmektir. Bu doğrultuda 29 özneyle derinlemesine görüşmeler yapılmıştır. Araştırma sonucunda elde edilen bulgulardan biri; boşanma öncesi dönemde görülen aile içi işlevsel olmayan etkileşim örüntülerinin, yabancılaşma deneyiminin bu dönemde temellenmesiyle bağlantılı oluşudur. Boşanmanın ve beraberinde yaşanan sorunların ise bu temelin üzerine eklemlenerek yabancılaşmayı güçlendiren dönüm noktaları görevi gördüğü anlaşılmıştır. Öznelerin ebeveynlerine karşı duygu ve düşüncelerinin, aile içi işlevsel olmayan ilişkiler nedeniyle yaşananların ve boşanmanın getirisiyle şekillendiği; boşanma sonrasında, öncesi olmayan bir yabancılaşmayı deneyimlediğini ifade eden bir özne olmadığı görülmüştür. Araştırmayla elde edilen bulgulara göre en belirgin öneriler; boşanmayla ilişkili tüm aşamalar boyunca ebeveyne yabancılaşma bağlamına özel olarak oluşturulacak bir aile danışmanlığı hizmetinin verilmesi ve velayet davalarında bir seçenek olan ortak velayet uygulamasının uygun görülen aileler için yaygınlaştırılmasıdır.
The family is the natural and primary environment for the individual, because it supports the socialization and personality and identity development of children. A divorced family is a type of family that occurs in three major forms, namely, death, divorce, and separation. Specifically, the study discusses the disintegration of families through divorce. Scholars note that children may become alienated, especially from the parent without custody, during the divorce process and related disputes. The dominant view in the literature is that alienation pertains to one of the parents knowingly alienating children from the other parent with various motivations. Previous studies point out that alienation develops due the negative behaviors of the parent who obtains custody toward the parent who is unable to obtain custody. Once again, according to the literature, alienation may occur due to the negative attitudes, feelings, and thoughts of parents toward each other in the presence of the children. In addition, alienation is widely known to occur for various reasons before, during, and/or after divorce, which may be due to dysfunctional communication patterns within the family, especially between parents. In this regard, this study intends to elucidate the experiences of the currently adult children of divorced families who underwent the divorce process when the children were less than 18 years. The study examines alienation from parents using structural family systems theory and aims to develop recommendations for solutions to this issue. Toward this end, it conducts in-depth interviews with 29 subjects. According to structural family systems theory, the relationships between and roles of family members are determined by interpersonal boundaries, which act as a barrier that protects integrity. Boundaries are defined according to their flexibility, such as solid, clear, and messy. Communication boundaries that emerge from dysfunctional interaction patterns within the family before the divorce and the relationship structures that are consequently formed are the first and most important connection with the alienation experience that occurs during this period. In addition, the abovementioned functional interaction patterns are a family structure that can provide clear boundaries. Scholars observe that divorce and related problems can reinforce adding to the experience of alienation. For a few of the subjects, the fact that divorce exerted a negative or no impact on their lives demonstrated the importance of family structure and relationships among members. The feelings and thoughts of the subjects toward their parents were shaped by the events they experienced due to dysfunctional relationships within the family and the consequences of divorce. It has been observed that the alienation experienced in the after-divorce period stems from before divorce life experiences. In the study, it was observed that the subjects experienced alienation before and after the divorce due to the previous process, and there was no subject who experienced alienation that did not originate from the before divorce process. The events before or during the divorce led their relationship with their parents to reach a level of alienation. This situation can be explained by the fact that alienation arises from the relational boundaries within the family, and the relationships that begin with these boundaries reach these boundaries again. In the light of these findings, one of the most prominent suggestions within the framework of social work is the implementation of family counseling services and support programs, which are currently offered by certain public institutions and organizations, such as the municipality, and are accessible to all family members throughout the process. However, the need emerges to be systematic, functional, and developed specifically for the context of parental alienation. Evidently, family counseling services that will monitor family relationships before, during, and after divorce are also important. The second recommendation is to promote the practice of joint custody, which should be put forward as an alternative option for families deemed suitable in custody cases.
